My grandmother passed away and left me a large inheritance. I informed my future husband, and he mentioned he would use it to pay off his credit card. I responded, “You can't do that without asking me first.” He seemed surprised and said…
Couples often find themselves disagreeing about money. Whether it's due to different spending habits, income differences, budgeting, financial reliance, or other problems, it's common for partners to struggle with managing their finances.
A woman took to the Reddit‘s thread ‘Am I The A*****e' to share how her relationship dynamics has been affected after she inherited a generous sum of money from her grandma.
The 32-year-old woman shared that she and her 35-year-old boyfriend recently got engaged after dating for five years. They have decided to tie the knot on May 25th.
Soon after getting engaged, the woman's grandmother passed away and left her a large amount of money. The grandmother and grandfather were successful and had well-paying jobs for most of their lives, and they wished for the original poster to receive all their savings accumulated over the years.
Naturally, OP shared the news with her soon-to-be husband.
She explained in her post that when she heard the news, she informed her fiancé who was extremely happy, even more than she anticipated. She didn't pay much attention to it at first, but later in the day, she overheard him talking to his friends while playing a game, saying, “I can use that money to pay off my credit card, mate! We can finally go on that boys' holiday we've been planning, right?” and they all laughed.
“I walked into the room and asked ‘What money?' and he immediately looked at me funny and said ‘From your nan, babe.'”
At an instant, she made sure he wasn't spending any money without her permission and that she would definitely not be spending any of her inheritance on a boys' holiday.
“‘It's not your money to have, it's written to me from MY nanna, it's not for you,'” she went on to say.
After that, OP stormed out of the room looking very upset. When he was done playing his game, her future husband began shouting at her. He said, “We're getting married, so you'll be my financial responsibility. Any money you earn is mine too. It was really selfish of you to embarrass me in front of my friends and give them false hope of a vacation.”
OP chose not to continue the argument and left for her friend's house in silence. Despite this, she was unsure if her decision was correct, so she sought advice from the Reddit community.
As expected, she received an outpouring of empathy from fellow netizens.
One person wrote, “Alright, he has made it clear that he considers you a burden and intends to spend money that isn't even his on his friends. Moreover, he is yelling at you because you refuse to go along with his intentions. You would be crazy to marry him.”
Another added: “You really want to marry this guy? There are 2 problems: 1. He assumed he's entitled to the money. 2. He assumed he can spend it on a discretionary item that does not include you. Pt2. is the bigger problem.”
The person commented, “Don't go through with the wedding. This man has unpaid credit card debt and consistently lives beyond his financial means. Also, he believes that what's his is his and what's yours is also his. This is not a good situation. Furthermore, his anger issues and sense of entitlement indicate that he displays typical traits of a narcissist.”
They continued: “Your grandparents last gift to you wasn't just the money, but the wisdom of who this guy really is underneath. No character, abusive, entitled, parasitic. Run.”
